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Does he still love me?

I'd rather he hate me, if his hate lasts forever, then that means that I'm in his heart forever. If he doesn't care anymore, however, I'd rather just die or disappear forever without a trace. Because if he doesn't feel anything anymore, then my existence in his life is meaningless, and my existence in this life is meaningless. I'd rather not care, but then again, I do.

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