I sometimes can't imagine that I'm a wife and mother. On so many levels, I am still very much that selfish little girl and sometimes, more so than when I was smaller and younger. But I am, truly, a mother and a wife already and on many counts, I'm both happy and apprehensive.
I want to say I’m ok without having to lie but I’m not. I’m worried about a lot of things right now they clog my brain. It must be why I didn’t sleep today. I should settle this life I’m living. I should find closure for all these worries. I should stop wanting more than what I already have. I should be done. However, what should be done has never been what I truly do. Smile and bear it. Ignore the bad thoughts. Just smile and bear it.
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